I always envisioned this blog would be inspirational. A vehicle for delivering to my devout readers all the amazing things this culture shift has brought to my life and the life of others. Instead, what I find is irritation, frustration and the urge to scream. Is this how it's supposed to be? Is this normal? Or are we just dysfunctional beyond hope?
Friday was our big "move". We had known for weeks that we were moving. And yet, as I walked through the space we were abandoning, all I saw was shit. Literally, piles and piles of it. Granted, the old and now un-used cubicles are being hauled off Monday. And Tuesday, a charity store is coming with a truck to pick up many of the odds and ends. But there will still just mounds and mounds of items that had not yet been sorted through and identified as "stay" or "go". It was frustrating to me.
And people were complaining about just about anything. There was a "spot" on the wall at the new office that did not match the rest of the paint. The landlord is picky. The storage room was laid out all wrong. But I just kept smiling and would just walk away - refusing to let the petty complaints spoil my day. The comments are unproductive - and have nothing to do with results - I don't have time to listen to them. Around 10:45, I texted over to the new office, "Do you all want to order pizza for lunch?!" The response? "Is Company X buying?" I just really wanted to break down into the fetal position on the floor and start crying. Instead, I replied back, "Is it possible to have ONE day without the negativity? Or are we that far gone? Of course Company X is buying - why else would I care what you want for lunch?" Spoiled rotten children. Brats. So we got them pizza. And we continued to plow through the mess and attempt to get ourselves organized at the new place. Knowing that next week we will have but 4 days to clean out the old place and it's a complete disaster area.
Yesterday I got an email from a staff member - asking, "Why are the water bottles stored in the bathroom? That's disgusting." I responded that I had last seen them in the kitchen, and another employee responded that they were indeed last seen in the kitchen at 8:00 p.m. Friday night. So obviously, the landlord had moved them. There must be some reason he doesn't want them stored in the kitchen. I explained that and then asked if they were wiped down with antibacterial wipes prior to placement on the water cooler, could we live with that or was this really a matter I needed to take up with the landlord. Response? "I'll bring my own water - this is disgusting."
And my whole mood changed. (of course the cloud cover that came through at about the same time didn't help either). I mean seriously? You have your freedom. You have a beautiful, new tool to use if you choose. And we're worried about petty shit like this? It's got NOTHING to do with results. And guess what? If we just canceled the water service - it would save us $75/month. So maybe that's what we'll do. I hate trivial bullshit. And this is right up there in that category. I can't deal with the childish behavior. I can't tolerate the incessant complaining about nothing. I can't find anything inspirational in any of it.
Is it me? Am I just at my limit with these people? Am I dealing with them incorrectly? Is it that perpetual sound of the bass in an Eminen song pumping through my vents at home from my daughter's room that causes my fuse to be short? My recent management style has been along the lines of STFU. I even decided to write a book about my style. It will be short. Four Words. Pre-highlighted. STFU. What do these people WANT from us? From me? Is this still just a normal reaction to their new freedom and a diversion for holding themselves accountable to results? I don't know. I don't have the answers.
I wish I did.
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